It's raining sixes and missed penalties

Newcastle 6 - Aston Villa 0

Wigan 0 - Chelsea 6

Arsenal 6 - Blackpool 0

Everton 1 - Wolverhampton 1

West Ham 1 - Bolton 3

West Brom 1 - Sunderland 0

Stoke City 1 - Tottenham Hotspur 2

Birmingham 2 - Blackburn 1

Manchester United 2 - Fulham 2 

An EPL weekend without a goalless draw? With in fact THIRTY EIGHT GOALS in nine matches? Yep, tonight was all that. We have heard about goals raining, but the folks at Newcastle, Chelsea and Arsenal were clearly hell-bent on showing us that scores of six did not happen just at tennis. Yes, Chelsea's demolition of Wigan seemed to be workmanlike and Arsenal's drubbing of Blackpool was silky smooth, but what really took the cake was Newcastle's demolition of Aston Villa.

Not a team known for pace, the Toon side took Villa apart with Joey Barton having the kind of game that made him a City legend not too long ago. Meanwhile, Theo Walcott made England boss Fabio Capello look a bit of a fool with his hat-trick against Blackpool, even as newcomer Chamakh finally scored a goal for the Gunners. Truth be told, I am not convinced he looks the part of deadly finisher - he misses more than he scores as of now. Chelsea, meanwhile are dealing in sixes. 12 goals in two matches marks a sensational start and while we may hem and haw about the quality of opposition (West Brom and Wigan are not exactly rich in the Force!), there can be no denying that the Blues look in very fine fettle indeed.

Among those not looking in fine fettle are not just Wigan (who have conceded ten in two matches), but most players who are stepping up to miss penalties. Villa missed one before Newcastle's goal deluge and Manchester United and Rovers' misses against Fulham and Birmingham perhaps cost them a few points. One would have thought that spot-kick techniques would have improved with all these tie-breakers around but clearly, EPL forwards are suffering from a state of butterboots.

The biggest result of the weekend, however, was Fulham's shock draw against Manchester United. No, I am not saying that because I am a Liverpool fan but just because it is nice to see a lower ranked team sock it to a big spender, and well, because I am a bit of a Mark Hughes fan. And heck, it is always good to see a man who has scored an own-goal redeem himself by scoring at the other end. Take a bow, Brede Hangeland.